Who Gave You the Gavel?

Why do you look at the speck in your brother’s eye but don’t notice the log in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ and look, there’s a log in your eye? Hypocrite! First take the log out of your eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye.

Matthew 7:3-5 HCSB

If you know me well enough by now, you know I have a deep abhorrence of hypocrites. (That’s just my being fancy and saying I don’t like judgmental people, lol). I pray daily for an open mind, and that God shows me the beauty in all things and people. Over the years I have grown to despise the tradition of religion and sought to understand God for myself. I recognized along the way that there are many people that put God in a box and so if you do not fit in that box, something must be wrong with you. After coming to terms with my calling, I struggled hard with this. Modern day preachers and prophets don’t fancy a woman speaking her views on God, let alone teaching others about God. Along with this, I have learned that if you do not look a certain way, talk like this or dress like that, you will garner a certain amount of sideways stares. I am about as different as they come, well not all the way. I have several tattoos, dress very fashionably at times, unique at others, love love love heels, and shy away from anything screaming tradition. So from this I am sure you know my plight, lol.

I love this passage because it reminds us to look first at ourselves. I’ll be the first to admit that I found flaw in everyone, having grown up to pick and point out other people’s flaws. That would be alright for a while, then when I got by myself and looked at myself, I would tear myself apart too, mainly because of the insecurities I had developed out of the things I had experienced growing up. Out of that birthed the need to protect and defend others, and to stand up for myself. The first person to say something disrespectful to me they would get their own tongue-lashing back, when I got older and stopped holding my tongue so much. Then as I grew tired of having to defend myself all the time, I realized the true source of the problem was the enemy and his efforts to discourage me from truly embracing what God wanted for me, which is relationship with himself and our brothers and sisters in Christ.

I will not sit here and write that I have a clean slate for my past. I have done my share of wrong, made my share of bad choices. I have hurt people and myself. But the one thing I have learned is that God forgives. Just as He is our ultimate judge, He also loves us so much that He will forgive our wrongs without need for anything in return. We are not the judge and jury (law school joke haha) so what gives us the right to slam the gavel on others? Now, there is a difference between bringing an issue before your brother or sister in Christ and talking about them and casting judgment. But the bittersweet part of all of this is that we can only learn the difference when we let God remove the blinders from our eyes that hide our truth. Don’t you want to see with clear vision? Remove your plank today and really see yourself as you are.

Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you. Matthew 7:1-2 NIV

Looking for Love

I haven’t written poetry in years but today and with everything that has been happening lately, I felt inspired. Hope it blesses you!

Looking for Love

Love, where are you? I’ve been searching high and low for you, looking over, in under and through people to find you, but your presence still evades me.

Love, where did you go? Why did you leave me? The air is still tinged with your aroma, with the effervescence of your essence and I still…can’t…find…YOU.

Love do you still exist? So much that my friends and family resort to a computer screen to find you when you used to be in between the cosmic condensation of space, called now, something we witnessed in our parents and grandparents, but yet now you elude us as life dilutes us from what is real…what is…you.

Love, what do I need to do, to have you here with me, permanently, conjunctively, with no dysfunctions or disjunctions? What do I need to do to feel your lasting warmth, your sweet embrace and to admire your lovely face? What do I need to do to just hold you, feel you and taste the air you breathe, my eyes are blind and I cannot see without you.

Love, deep in my heart I cannot doubt the seeds you planted when you left. I cannot allow the reality of right now to disillusion me against the realness of your message, of your sentences filled with verbs—your words, singing to my heart, that even though sometimes we are distant we will never part, that you hold my heart. Even when chasing dreams and ambitions hide your smile from eyesight’s view, I must keep hold of vision, to you I remain true.

Love, thank you for the reminder that when I doubt you’re there I must look within to that place, that now dark, damp and dusty place where you once lived, and if I gaze on the memory I realize that you never left me and you will always live within me as long as I am true to myself and remember why My Father gave you to me…so that others can see Him through me, so that each days mercies are new to me, and so that He can use me, to find you.

Marquita 02/20/2013

1 Corinthians 13:4-8

Love is patient. Love is kind. Love isn’t jealous. It doesn’t sing its own praises. It isn’t arrogant. It isn’t rude. It doesn’t think about itself. It isn’t irritable. It doesn’t keep track of wrongs. It isn’t happy when injustice is done, but it is happy with the truth. Love never stops being patient, never stops believing, never stops hoping, never gives up.
Love never comes to an end.