Are You Holding On To People Past Their Expiration Date?

"Do not let your heart be troubled; believe in God, believe also in Me." John 14:1 NASB
It took the loss of some friendships and gaining some new ones to realize why God does things the way He does sometimes. I was particularly hurt when one of my friends from Charleston cut off all contact with me…I haven’t heard from her since before my birthday. I have reached out, but nothing. I had another friend to do this to me too and I have a "No Friends Left Behind" motto–only applicable to my true friends or people I care for strongly (thanks Dee lol). The loss of these relationships created voids in my life, that have now been filled by God himself, either with new relationships or with His purpose. Anyway, it wasn’t until a recent conversation that I realized why the relationships had changed…I had changed.

God has been working on me, and one of the things I had been praying for is divine relationships and discernment of people and spirits. Everybody is not for you!! I had to learn that the hard way, keeping people and allowing relationships to linger that were way past their expiration date. Recognize the reason that you connect with these people. See I connected with her after my dad died–we related on things that had happened in our pasts. If you have any relationships where you are connecting with people based on past events…prepare yourself because it could be a possibility that if you cannot connect on anything after those issues have been resolved or you have been delivered from them, that your need for the relationship ends. It could be possible that the purpose of the relationship has been served and thus that person’s season in your life has ended.

This was hard, and painful to learn. I take hold of people and I want everybody to win, I want everybody to experience God’s goodness with me. Now, that isn’t to say that God will not reconcile you later or that those people will not experience the abundance of God’s blessings. It says that God is opening your hands like He did mine, and making room for bigger and better things by creating space for you to hold them.

How do you deal with this? The key is to wholeheartedly trust God and allow Him to heal you from the hurt that comes with loss. You have to grieve the loss because in your mind you will always come back to the relationship and wonder. This is just another faith act for you, trusting God’s will and believing that He is orchestrating this to work in His grand plan for your life. With that said, evaluate your relationships and determine who has outlived their shelf life! Ask God for courage to let go if that is His will and for the peace to press forward until He presents the next piece to your puzzle!

You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in you. Isaiah 26:3 NIV

You Are What You Believe

“Therefore I say to you, all things for which you pray and ask, believe that you have received them, and they will be granted you.” Mark 11:24 NASB

I was talking with one of my best friends today and I realized something. He was talking about an area in which he struggled and how it related to his family; actually his exact words were ‘family curse.’ I recently realized myself how certain things from my family and childhood loomed over me into my adult life. Prime example, I was told as a child that I would end up like my aunts who were not the best in their dealings with men. Although I didn’t let this frame my outcome because I believe in proving people wrong when they have negative things to say about me–it still lingered until I asked God to show me all the things that were hindering me from receiving all I asked for. Those negative words took root in some form and as hard as I tried, I believed them. (This refers to my meditation on those words, which in turn gave them power over me…another devotion :p)

Mark 11:24 above says that in all things we pray and ask for, that if we put our action faith of believing that we have already received them, then we already received them. This relates directly to the above story and my experiences because it was not until I recognized the curse spoken over me and believed differently, that things started to shift in my life. I know that ‘generational curses’ existed in the Old Testament, but because I joined God’s family those things no longer apply. It is not until we change what we believe that change actually occurs. As for my friend, he won’t change until he sees himself as God sees him–which requires him to submit to God everything and in everything–delivered from that spirit. Likewise, I did not change until I realized my salvation was a package deal, not just being delivered from one stronghold but all. The battle we fight friends is within our minds and as long as we keep in the Word and trust God to do what He says, we can become what we believe.

Whether you are believing for healing, restoration, finances, love, etc., as long as you hold on to your faith and believe as well as do what God has told you to do, primarily forgive, what you believe will change what you see before you in the mirror. Because you only see what you believe…

“But when you ask him, be sure that your faith is in God alone. Do not waver, for a person with divided loyalty is as unsettled as a wave of the sea that is blown and tossed by the wind.” James 1:6 NLT